Moving from Egypt to America
Today, I started reading the book, “The Divine Mentor” that Debbie McGrath gave me before I left to Egypt. I have been suffering from severe loneliness, wondering why God brought me to America when my ministry, TV show, camps and counseling were going so well in Egypt. It was as if God has actually and literally plucked me out of Egypt and planted me in Atlanta where…. I am currently doing NOTHING. This feeling has left me feeling useless, lonely and helpless. My loneliness is so intense, it is palpable. As I started the book, I read about the sequoia tree that- after generations- fell down, crashed down and the reason is: foot traffic.
God started speaking to me: Laila, I brought you to Atlanta because you had too much foot traffic around you and I did not want to leave you there till you crashed, I HAD to do something to save you, and I know you would not have done it on your own… you couldn't.
Funny, how I have been reading my Bible since 1973 and never noticed this verse that Cordeiro quoted here: Proverbs 24.32 “when I saw, I reflected upon it; I looked, and received instruction”. You’d think I would have seen this verse before especially that this is one of my mottos in life.
What did the sequoia tree feel as people tread all around her? Did it actually enjoy all the hustle and bustle? Did it sometimes wish it could be quieter around her? Did it enjoy the quietness of night? As people sat at her feet enjoying its shade, did the sequoia feel so useful, like it was the most important tree in Yosemite? If someone lit fire and came too close to her.. well alas, it could not scream. Did the tree ever feel trapped in that place? It was only after this mighty tree crashed, that public officials decided to fence some of the oldest, largest and most historical trees. But… it was too late for that tree that fell down. As I realized it was God who put a fence around me to keep others, to keep even ministry, relationships, counselees from trampling my root system, I felt a gush of thankfulness and relief rise up in my soul.
I will not lie and say that my loneliness has totally left me, but I will say this: I am glad God looks after me and I thank Him that as a sterling vinedresser, the Lord plants me, plucks me, prunes me, fences me, replants me as HE pleases. To Him be the Glory
No comments:
Post a Comment